Selfish compassion

A text from a friend today, "Who knew being "selfish" was one of the most compassionate things you could do for people?"

This was in response to my asking him if he would make it to my class today. My friend is a healer. A talented "I've been doing this for many lifetimes" healer and he is in high demand. But we all have our lessons to learn on this journey, and it seems that one of his lessons is this idea-- that in order to help others we have to take time for ourselves.

Every relationship is like this. It's easy to get so caught up in the other person that you forget to take time to be alone, to swallow emptiness. We all need this alone- ness from time to time. Your yoga practice is just one of the ways to find it. Where it is all about you...this space, this time. Sometimes I am away for so long that when i return I gulp and I gasp and I pull as much emptiness as I can into myself. Sometimes it is violent. Sometimes I come to my mat screaming in my head, "LEAVE ME ALONE!"

And the reason that it is so hard to take this space, so hard to say no and walk away from others when you need it--is that you forget that the space you take is really for them.

If you don't create a space for yourself in your life, you will begin to burn out. You will lose your temper. You will begin to fill with negative thoughts. You will push people away subconsciously and have regrets later. You will hurt them more in the long run. You will no longer want to heal people. You will no longer want to teach people.

Take time for yourself. Be compassionately selfish. Keep the desire to help others alive in yourself by first helping yourself.